The only reason i'm keeping up with this blog, and trying to note things down, is because in the years to come, i want to look back at all the things that i've posted, and remember things that i had long forgotten! For example i don't want me 10 years from now, reminiscing about the "good ole days" and not remember specific details..like the name of the boy i dated..or how my prom was (it sucked btw, but this is just to set an example)..So yea, here goes:
I've only fallen in love once, i don't know how it happened and what led me to fall for him, but it did..after him there were a couple of other random guys i thought i liked, but truth is, i only wanted someone to hug & cuddle, n the usual stuff couples do..However, there was this one guy i was talking to, like 10 years my senior! and always thought we'd just be friends, nothing more..Oh i was so wrong, i started to like him!! i wanted to date him..i don't get it, i mean all the signals indicated that he was into me as well..but then he just disappeared! haven't heard from him in almost 3 weeks now! So anyway, i guess that was that, all i'd like to tell him now is that..Your loss buddy!..I know i've doubted myself and my abilities in everything throughout the years! i still somehow do, but deep down, i know i'm worth it, & even more! Matter of fact..most guys don't even deserve it! I'm not bragging, i'm just speaking the facts!
Anyway, other than that i've been going through these weird mood swings, mostly sad ones..i'm waiting for my uni results..which will be out on Sunday the 10th!! oh YAY *sarcasm*..but yeah, gotta wait and see.
I got the movie The Dark Knight from this guy who works with me, and i'm gonna watch it on the weekend..OH YAY..i've been hearing so much about it!! and hopefully it's worth the 2.5 hours!!
I've also started walking :D ..which is super GREAT, i'll reach my ideal weight in a matter of months!
On Saturday i'm going to my sister's chalet with Ms. Atkins ;** ..YES we're talking again! i decided i sorta missed her and want her in my life..so i called her and we're on good terms now..and always hopefully!
I'm also looking for a better job..all these interviews and rejections are exhausting me! i feel so lifeless!..Sometimes i just wanna lie on my bed the whole day, the whole week, not doing anything!..not anything productive that is!..but i know what it's like to waste time doing absolutely nothing! i'm a living example! 2 years of nothingness and now i'm trying to get back up on my feet but it's hard!! it's worth the struggle, but i don't have all the necessities, and i don't want to crash and burn!
God, i need you..
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Sunday, August 3, 2008
I WAS PREGNANT!
Okay, now people who know me know that i have the weirdest dreams ever..like ever..
but yesterday's dream..!! well it wasn't weird.. it was just not likely of me to even think of it!!
Dude i was pregant!!! some random dude had knocked me up!! And surprisingly i was very OK with it!! and so were my family.....MY MOM WAS OKAY WITH ME BEING KNOCKED UP MAN!! CAN YOU FRIGGIN IMAGINE ?? ..okay maybe not.
That's besides the point, i was literally fine with conceiving a kid by some random stranger..:|
ANYWAY, i'd decided to give it away..i didn't want to be tied down..my responsibilities would soon increase! i'd have to take care of someone else..other than myself, which btw i do a lousy job at!! ..So i was giving my baby away to my best friend's sister, who was a newlywed, and apparently a barren n couldn't conceive! they were thrilled!! And His family was too!
So everything was miya miya untiiiiiiiilllllllllllllllll.. * drum roll please*.................until i started to ""connect"" with the brat!!........i was actually happy i was going to give birth..knowing he/she would come out my vagina was a bit disturbing..mortifying really.. BUT every mother goes through it, right ?
So a few days before the delivery..while i was "connecting" with my unborn child, i decided i didn't want to give my baby away! I decided the baby was mine, n i wasn't willing to let what's mine go!! so i was gonna keep it!! but didn't tell the foster parents out of fear! i said to myself ill tell em after the baby's born..n well..IT WAS HELL..they were always around me!! even at the hospital on the day of the delivery :( they all looked so happy n cheery, i didn't want to spoil anything....Knowing i'd prolly be forbidden to visit my friend n her family, and we'd probably stop talking afterwards..i seriously couldn't care of anything else except the ""bundle of joy"" that was soon to pop out from my vagina........ofcourse i've always imagined the pain and suffery i'd have to go through..and THANK GOODNESS i didn't dream of that part.....my alarm clock went off at 5:30 AM and woke me up :) AMEN.
Kay so back to me always contradicting myself, and ending up actually liking and wanting the things i always told myself a trillion times i'd never like or do or wtv..ARGHH so i actually want to have babies now.....MATERNAL INSTINCT ??..maybe.....whatever it was, it was nice! to actually create a new being would feel incredible!!
OKay enough with the mushy talk..AHH i wouldn't even want to imagine how my BODY would look like..like a 100 year old saggy woman!! ARE YOU FRIGGIN BULLSHITTING ME?!?!?!WTF..WHY WOULD I DO THAT ??..i liiiike being thin & fit!! i don't want to ruin my figure, no sir :'(
Ahh well, cheers to the bastard who will marry me ..case closed!
Ya but umm, back to my story..what's the friggin meaning of this dream ? Normally people would say it has something to do with my subconscious and that it has "hidden" meanings and secret symbols or wtv..all i know is that they mean something..and whether it's tryna convey a message..or tell me something..i don't friggin know..but i'm superstitious like that..and just plain curious! ..ANYONE ?!?!
*On a lighter note - i just found out this morning that a guy i was seeing like 75645 ages ago is getting engaged :D filthy bastard!! 2al wants to settle down 2al..uhh poor thing that's gonna put up with his psychosis!! i'm just glad he's gonna stop annoying me with his phone calls :) CHEERS TO THAT.
PS. how cool would it be to have a mini me ? ;) someone who i can teach all my tricks and the shiiiiz that i do ;) lolol..seriously! it would be a blessing like no other!!..the world wouldn't be complete until i give birth to an infant!
but yesterday's dream..!! well it wasn't weird.. it was just not likely of me to even think of it!!
Dude i was pregant!!! some random dude had knocked me up!! And surprisingly i was very OK with it!! and so were my family.....MY MOM WAS OKAY WITH ME BEING KNOCKED UP MAN!! CAN YOU FRIGGIN IMAGINE ?? ..okay maybe not.
That's besides the point, i was literally fine with conceiving a kid by some random stranger..:|
ANYWAY, i'd decided to give it away..i didn't want to be tied down..my responsibilities would soon increase! i'd have to take care of someone else..other than myself, which btw i do a lousy job at!! ..So i was giving my baby away to my best friend's sister, who was a newlywed, and apparently a barren n couldn't conceive! they were thrilled!! And His family was too!
So everything was miya miya untiiiiiiiilllllllllllllllll.. * drum roll please*.................until i started to ""connect"" with the brat!!........i was actually happy i was going to give birth..knowing he/she would come out my vagina was a bit disturbing..mortifying really.. BUT every mother goes through it, right ?
So a few days before the delivery..while i was "connecting" with my unborn child, i decided i didn't want to give my baby away! I decided the baby was mine, n i wasn't willing to let what's mine go!! so i was gonna keep it!! but didn't tell the foster parents out of fear! i said to myself ill tell em after the baby's born..n well..IT WAS HELL..they were always around me!! even at the hospital on the day of the delivery :( they all looked so happy n cheery, i didn't want to spoil anything....Knowing i'd prolly be forbidden to visit my friend n her family, and we'd probably stop talking afterwards..i seriously couldn't care of anything else except the ""bundle of joy"" that was soon to pop out from my vagina........ofcourse i've always imagined the pain and suffery i'd have to go through..and THANK GOODNESS i didn't dream of that part.....my alarm clock went off at 5:30 AM and woke me up :) AMEN.
Kay so back to me always contradicting myself, and ending up actually liking and wanting the things i always told myself a trillion times i'd never like or do or wtv..ARGHH so i actually want to have babies now.....MATERNAL INSTINCT ??..maybe.....whatever it was, it was nice! to actually create a new being would feel incredible!!
OKay enough with the mushy talk..AHH i wouldn't even want to imagine how my BODY would look like..like a 100 year old saggy woman!! ARE YOU FRIGGIN BULLSHITTING ME?!?!?!WTF..WHY WOULD I DO THAT ??..i liiiike being thin & fit!! i don't want to ruin my figure, no sir :'(
Ahh well, cheers to the bastard who will marry me ..case closed!
Ya but umm, back to my story..what's the friggin meaning of this dream ? Normally people would say it has something to do with my subconscious and that it has "hidden" meanings and secret symbols or wtv..all i know is that they mean something..and whether it's tryna convey a message..or tell me something..i don't friggin know..but i'm superstitious like that..and just plain curious! ..ANYONE ?!?!
*On a lighter note - i just found out this morning that a guy i was seeing like 75645 ages ago is getting engaged :D filthy bastard!! 2al wants to settle down 2al..uhh poor thing that's gonna put up with his psychosis!! i'm just glad he's gonna stop annoying me with his phone calls :) CHEERS TO THAT.
PS. how cool would it be to have a mini me ? ;) someone who i can teach all my tricks and the shiiiiz that i do ;) lolol..seriously! it would be a blessing like no other!!..the world wouldn't be complete until i give birth to an infant!
Monday, July 28, 2008
Losing my Brain Cells..
Alright, i'm completely aware that i've been MIA since May 21st.....but BEHOLD, The great DM is back.. and back for good :D..for now :/
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I, personally stereotype people A LOT, they're just too predictable. unless they act like total A-holes, umm ya I sort of saw it coming, but somewhat done differently.
What can I say, people are too dull and annoying to be around! 99% of the population are annoying fuckers who are totally dispensable, I’d totally pour gasoline all over you & burn you to ashes, if 30 years to life was not the obstacle. (Hitler much ?)
I want EXCITEMENT! People who are not afraid to be themselves..And by that I don’t mean people who are friggin optimistic & freakishly perky 24 fucking 7.
exhibit A – How annoying is it to go to starbucks early in the morning, like reeeally early (and this has actually happened to me) , sit down wait for your order..A guy walks in..he’s tall, white, with seemingly nice hair..and great dentals, which you can spot a mile away! Dude is grinning like his sides are about to split!! DUDE IS OVERLY EXCITED AND HAPPY..WHY ?? FREAKING WHY ?? ..You can tell dude’s not from around here..he’s most probably an arab who’s lived in a foreign country..he’s DEFO not a khaliji! So he sits on the table right across mine, looks at me, and smiles,, and well, being the loving gentle, “peaceful” creature that I am ..I smile back,,he smiles again, he looks around, and smiles some more,,,,looks at me and goes “what a wonderful morning :D” ..so I’m thinking.,”Someone got lucky this morning?! Was It a new condom he used ?? hmm..”..(off topic but why do people refer to fucking as getting lucky? It’s fucking annoying..)....Okay DUDE, I like the fact that you’re happy but unless you’re a chick, or Gay, you do NOT do that in public dude, ..you never know when you’ll run into your future wife, and as you very well know, first impressions count the most..Unless you’re me, then you’re bound to make a complete fool of yourself,,on your 1st, 2nd , 3rd & most possibly all the impressions you’ll be making throughout your entire freaking life..(which include tripping, spilling, starring (I like to call observing), breaking, randomly blabbering non stop..like right now :/ ) But ya, he sort of cheered me up………I SAID SORT OF, SO BACK OFF!
.
.
Aaaand I do NOT like people who are too fucking depressive……friggin bums!
People who cannot stop complaining, bitch pleeeeease, I’ve got my own shit to deal with! I don’t need to listen to yours! Let me get one thing straight..when it comes to this..Sharing is NOT Caring!..Unless I give you the green light, shut your yapp!
.
I’ve not run into that many unique people…..well ofcourse God thinks every1z unique in his/her own special way,,suuuure, that’s what we tell handi’s!! but that doesn’t mean they actually ARE..so don’t flatter yourself much..
I’ve met a lot of PLASTICS! ..The worst part is, them knowing who they are, and actually liking it. I actually tried being one, yeah sue me!………But it didn’t work. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I’ve never been able to fit myself into any category..might as well join the looserss, they seem to have an opening for an extra member..eekh.
.
.
*to be continued..*
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I, personally stereotype people A LOT, they're just too predictable. unless they act like total A-holes, umm ya I sort of saw it coming, but somewhat done differently.
What can I say, people are too dull and annoying to be around! 99% of the population are annoying fuckers who are totally dispensable, I’d totally pour gasoline all over you & burn you to ashes, if 30 years to life was not the obstacle. (Hitler much ?)
I want EXCITEMENT! People who are not afraid to be themselves..And by that I don’t mean people who are friggin optimistic & freakishly perky 24 fucking 7.
exhibit A – How annoying is it to go to starbucks early in the morning, like reeeally early (and this has actually happened to me) , sit down wait for your order..A guy walks in..he’s tall, white, with seemingly nice hair..and great dentals, which you can spot a mile away! Dude is grinning like his sides are about to split!! DUDE IS OVERLY EXCITED AND HAPPY..WHY ?? FREAKING WHY ?? ..You can tell dude’s not from around here..he’s most probably an arab who’s lived in a foreign country..he’s DEFO not a khaliji! So he sits on the table right across mine, looks at me, and smiles,, and well, being the loving gentle, “peaceful” creature that I am ..I smile back,,he smiles again, he looks around, and smiles some more,,,,looks at me and goes “what a wonderful morning :D” ..so I’m thinking.,”Someone got lucky this morning?! Was It a new condom he used ?? hmm..”..(off topic but why do people refer to fucking as getting lucky? It’s fucking annoying..)....Okay DUDE, I like the fact that you’re happy but unless you’re a chick, or Gay, you do NOT do that in public dude, ..you never know when you’ll run into your future wife, and as you very well know, first impressions count the most..Unless you’re me, then you’re bound to make a complete fool of yourself,,on your 1st, 2nd , 3rd & most possibly all the impressions you’ll be making throughout your entire freaking life..(which include tripping, spilling, starring (I like to call observing), breaking, randomly blabbering non stop..like right now :/ ) But ya, he sort of cheered me up………I SAID SORT OF, SO BACK OFF!
.
.
Aaaand I do NOT like people who are too fucking depressive……friggin bums!
People who cannot stop complaining, bitch pleeeeease, I’ve got my own shit to deal with! I don’t need to listen to yours! Let me get one thing straight..when it comes to this..Sharing is NOT Caring!..Unless I give you the green light, shut your yapp!
.
I’ve not run into that many unique people…..well ofcourse God thinks every1z unique in his/her own special way,,suuuure, that’s what we tell handi’s!! but that doesn’t mean they actually ARE..so don’t flatter yourself much..
I’ve met a lot of PLASTICS! ..The worst part is, them knowing who they are, and actually liking it. I actually tried being one, yeah sue me!………But it didn’t work. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I’ve never been able to fit myself into any category..might as well join the looserss, they seem to have an opening for an extra member..eekh.
.
.
*to be continued..*
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
FooFy's Birthday
So last weekend, i went out with one of my close friends to celebrate his birthday! There were supposedly going to be 8 people in total! 3 girls and 5 guys.. So when we get to Friday's, we were the 1st ones there, me n him, we wait for about half an hour until the other 4 guys showed up..now, i'm not sayin i don't mingle with boys and try to be a part of the "shillah" bs these are the kind that only talk about the shallow things..ya3ny my relationship with them would be totally "9a67i"..
And so i was feeling left out & wierded out..until Kesha (the 2nd girl) came along..HIIYA!
The 3rd girl bailed out on us..loser!!..and ofcourse me & Kesha were feeling bored out of our minds, so she suggested(jokingly) that we go for a ride on the gulf in her Mercedes convertible..yessssss! i said let's go!
Her ride is amazingg! and the color..RED!!
It took us about 40 minutes or so to go for a spin and then go back to Friday's!
The girl drives like a maniac, hehe, and there were shitload of guys following us, now you don't see me complaining, but..ya3ny ma9a5tooha 3ad..
This one guy was following us in his huge big ass Yukon, he followed us all the way back to the parking, we tried to dodge & lose him, but he insisted on following us! :/
So Kesha lowered the volume & was like "na3am?"
He started saying some stuff..i couldn't stop laughing at that point..
"bas kilma" he insisted! lool..i couldn't even look at him with a straight face..
And then the most interesting thing happened! this was a 1st for me bsara7a..!!
She said "i have a boyfriend"..and he was like "9j ? 7elfay?"..she was like "ee i have a bf"..and he just simply up & left.. i was like "WHAT ? R U KIDDING ME? THAT'S IT ?? THAT'S ALL IT TOOK ?" loool & we were cracking up..
We went inside..and sat with the boys..they brought the cake (chocolate) ..put it on the table,,and all of a sudden Foofy's friends just slammed his head into the cake..loool!!
It was fun, but it could definitely have been better!
XoXo
And so i was feeling left out & wierded out..until Kesha (the 2nd girl) came along..HIIYA!
The 3rd girl bailed out on us..loser!!..and ofcourse me & Kesha were feeling bored out of our minds, so she suggested(jokingly) that we go for a ride on the gulf in her Mercedes convertible..yessssss! i said let's go!
Her ride is amazingg! and the color..RED!!
It took us about 40 minutes or so to go for a spin and then go back to Friday's!
The girl drives like a maniac, hehe, and there were shitload of guys following us, now you don't see me complaining, but..ya3ny ma9a5tooha 3ad..
This one guy was following us in his huge big ass Yukon, he followed us all the way back to the parking, we tried to dodge & lose him, but he insisted on following us! :/
So Kesha lowered the volume & was like "na3am?"
He started saying some stuff..i couldn't stop laughing at that point..
"bas kilma" he insisted! lool..i couldn't even look at him with a straight face..
And then the most interesting thing happened! this was a 1st for me bsara7a..!!
She said "i have a boyfriend"..and he was like "9j ? 7elfay?"..she was like "ee i have a bf"..and he just simply up & left.. i was like "WHAT ? R U KIDDING ME? THAT'S IT ?? THAT'S ALL IT TOOK ?" loool & we were cracking up..
We went inside..and sat with the boys..they brought the cake (chocolate) ..put it on the table,,and all of a sudden Foofy's friends just slammed his head into the cake..loool!!
It was fun, but it could definitely have been better!
XoXo
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Upcoming weekend
So i've got my BFF's sister's engagement party to attend to on thursday, and i've got everything ready, my pink dress, my pink shoes, my pink purse, my pink head band,lol my pink phone!..except one little itsy bitsy minor detail.....MY HAIR!!
WHAT AM I GOING TO DO ABOUT MY HAIR ?
Should i straighten my extremely curly hair ?
Or should i leave it curly and go to an engagement party and look like i'm going to a regular gathering..NO! i have to straighten it!!
I've been wanting to change my look for quite some time now..i used to change it every couple of months/weeks even! But then my hair started to fall oo balawy ! :(
Anyhoo..i'm really excited..i hope all goes well..
And i don't know why the sudden obsession with pink lately! i find it rather cute~ :)
Back in highschool you would have NEVER seen me wear pink! it was always black, black & black..But, i'm starting to get more colorful as time goes by :)
I now like to feel vibrant & ALIVE.
OK, so this partay is going to start at 9/10 & end around 2/3 AM..i hope they play good music or else i'll be bored out of my mind!!
On friday however, i'm having a gathering @ my place for the girlies! Hope everyone shows up, cause i aint goin shopping tomorrow for nuthin!
On saturday....i might hit the beach for a good tan..we'll have to wait and see what happens.
Afterall, why make plans!
As John Lennon said, and i quote " life happens when you're too busy making plans"..and got shot & died........Oh well! :)
XoXo
WHAT AM I GOING TO DO ABOUT MY HAIR ?
Should i straighten my extremely curly hair ?
Or should i leave it curly and go to an engagement party and look like i'm going to a regular gathering..NO! i have to straighten it!!
I've been wanting to change my look for quite some time now..i used to change it every couple of months/weeks even! But then my hair started to fall oo balawy ! :(
Anyhoo..i'm really excited..i hope all goes well..
And i don't know why the sudden obsession with pink lately! i find it rather cute~ :)
Back in highschool you would have NEVER seen me wear pink! it was always black, black & black..But, i'm starting to get more colorful as time goes by :)
I now like to feel vibrant & ALIVE.
OK, so this partay is going to start at 9/10 & end around 2/3 AM..i hope they play good music or else i'll be bored out of my mind!!
On friday however, i'm having a gathering @ my place for the girlies! Hope everyone shows up, cause i aint goin shopping tomorrow for nuthin!
On saturday....i might hit the beach for a good tan..we'll have to wait and see what happens.
Afterall, why make plans!
As John Lennon said, and i quote " life happens when you're too busy making plans"..and got shot & died........Oh well! :)
XoXo
Friday, May 16, 2008
Embrace Innovation <3
Friday morning, and my parents are travelling for their 3 months summer vacation!
It's gonna be somewhat hard taking care of the house, but i suppose i'll manage..i've done it before & i can do it again.
So it's FooFy's birthday on Sunday! we were initially gonna go out to Friday's yesterday, but with the Sheikh's death, it was closed everywhere! So we decided today would be best!
i just hope during this long period of time, i can fix my sleeping disorder, and quite possibly sleep longer, for atleast 8 hours everyday!
Me & homegirl(my BFF) are no longer as close as we used to be..her bf is her main getaway person now! I guess i've put up with her attitude for a long time..i mean, yes she has school, yes her parents are a pain in the ass, yes she has problems in her life, but to shun me out ...... i didn't think she had it in her.
Oh well, people tend to be disappointing..
It's her sister's engagement next thursday, i'm going to attend it, but i don't think we'll have much contact afterwards!
I had the wierdest dream last night/this morning..i was in school, and i had a fight with 2 guys..and ended up getting expelled! :S & Hadi was my teacher! lol.......
My daddio was sick & hospitalized.. It was homegirl's sister's engagement party,and they were doing it @ their place..but their house was different in my dream..it looked somewhat better!lol
I'm going to try & look @ the brighter side of things..i'm trying..so hopefully it'll work !
Hope summer brings out the best in all of us ;*
It's gonna be somewhat hard taking care of the house, but i suppose i'll manage..i've done it before & i can do it again.
So it's FooFy's birthday on Sunday! we were initially gonna go out to Friday's yesterday, but with the Sheikh's death, it was closed everywhere! So we decided today would be best!
i just hope during this long period of time, i can fix my sleeping disorder, and quite possibly sleep longer, for atleast 8 hours everyday!
Me & homegirl(my BFF) are no longer as close as we used to be..her bf is her main getaway person now! I guess i've put up with her attitude for a long time..i mean, yes she has school, yes her parents are a pain in the ass, yes she has problems in her life, but to shun me out ...... i didn't think she had it in her.
Oh well, people tend to be disappointing..
It's her sister's engagement next thursday, i'm going to attend it, but i don't think we'll have much contact afterwards!
I had the wierdest dream last night/this morning..i was in school, and i had a fight with 2 guys..and ended up getting expelled! :S & Hadi was my teacher! lol.......
My daddio was sick & hospitalized.. It was homegirl's sister's engagement party,and they were doing it @ their place..but their house was different in my dream..it looked somewhat better!lol
I'm going to try & look @ the brighter side of things..i'm trying..so hopefully it'll work !
Hope summer brings out the best in all of us ;*
Friday, May 9, 2008
Out with BillyBob!
What a transformation!
Good news: i don't feel as down as i have been all day yesterday!
i don't know what it is exactly, that's eating me inside out! that little disease in me that keeps on crawling back everytime..when i remember i just shiver..
What is it ? i can't quite put my fingers on it, but it's the fear that lives inside me..
How could've i let in all those people easily,and been naive enough to not have known thay one day..i would have to replace them!
AHH..the pain & misery that is love!
Anyhoo, from now on i'll think happy thoughts! Thanks to my friend BillyBob who always make me feel out of this world :) even for a lil while! he cheers me up ;*
I'm currently psyched about the new pink Samsung phone i bought! will have to go and pimp it though..crystalization, baybeh!
Foofy called! oh, how considerate of him! a true friend in deed! if only they can see that........*breathe out*
life is full of surprises..i never said i don't like surprises, because i love them! But sometimes, the shock is just too painful.
Oh well!
Stay tuned..
Good news: i don't feel as down as i have been all day yesterday!
i don't know what it is exactly, that's eating me inside out! that little disease in me that keeps on crawling back everytime..when i remember i just shiver..
What is it ? i can't quite put my fingers on it, but it's the fear that lives inside me..
How could've i let in all those people easily,and been naive enough to not have known thay one day..i would have to replace them!
AHH..the pain & misery that is love!
Anyhoo, from now on i'll think happy thoughts! Thanks to my friend BillyBob who always make me feel out of this world :) even for a lil while! he cheers me up ;*
I'm currently psyched about the new pink Samsung phone i bought! will have to go and pimp it though..crystalization, baybeh!
Foofy called! oh, how considerate of him! a true friend in deed! if only they can see that........*breathe out*
life is full of surprises..i never said i don't like surprises, because i love them! But sometimes, the shock is just too painful.
Oh well!
Stay tuned..
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